Lessons on life...with Full Moon Fever

Discussion in 'The Dirty Dozen' started by Full Moon Fever, Dec 19, 2010.

  1. Full Moon Fever

    Full Moon Fever Champion of Standards

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    What I learned today...


    Author's foreword...

    ...For reasons ill not get into on here, i was using the pull-out method...

    While partaking in a little afternoon delight (and for those of you that don't know, Sunday midday is the absolute best time for it), I pulled out for the big finish. I learned that it is inappropriate to exclaim "Boom Headshot!"

    Add that to the list that also includes "Raider Power!"


    ...also, apparently eel is a common food and eaten as/with sushi regularly. As such, it is inappropriate to nod and chuckle when another member of your bible study says "my wife eats eel all the time."

    ...as you were.
     
  2. JQwon13

    JQwon13 Walk On

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    Hahah, well played sir.

    One time with the ex, I pulled out and yell "Yahtzee!"
     
  3. Bl0ndeRedHead

    Bl0ndeRedHead Official TSO Pothead

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    What is this pulling out nonsense?
     
  4. DirtycashDylan

    DirtycashDylan I came here to scheme and chew bubblegum...

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    I was banging this chick on again/off again in college and she knew I didn't wear condoms so she made sure to take her birth control regularly. After an extended break, I head over to get some ass and when I get there she tells me not to bust in her because she isn't on the pill and I say okie dokie. I'm on the floor and she's on top in a cowgirl position but leaned back and I'm sitting upright. so she's humping away and it's just not happening for me tonight for whatever reason and I'm getting bored when I decide to have some fun. I start moaning like it's about to happen and she starts to lift off me when I grab her hips and slam her back down on my dick and have the biggest, fakest orgasm ever while throwing my head back and yelling. I've got my eyes closed but she is totally still and silent. I peak my eyes open and she's looking at me like I just fingerbanged her cat and I die laughing. good times.
     
  5. JQwon13

    JQwon13 Walk On

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    Wow...that was descriptive...
     
  6. DirtycashDylan

    DirtycashDylan I came here to scheme and chew bubblegum...

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    Then one time at a club in Albuquerque, this girl was sucking me off in the DJ booth like she had been doing on a daily basis. She hated the taste of jizz. She was down to blow me every day as long as I let her know so she didn't get it in her mouth. On this particular day, I let her know and she took it out of her mouth and let it fly. She's getting back up and we realize that the nut went all over the computer screen! you could see the drips. We had a good laugh at that one.
     
  7. DirtycashDylan

    DirtycashDylan I came here to scheme and chew bubblegum...

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    Dirtycash story time>JQwon story time
     
  8. JQwon13

    JQwon13 Walk On

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    False... My stories are detailed and humorous. Yours are disturbingly gross...
     
  9. DirtycashDylan

    DirtycashDylan I came here to scheme and chew bubblegum...

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    disturbingly gross=detailed and humorous

    your stories are only detailed
     
  10. DirtycashDylan

    DirtycashDylan I came here to scheme and chew bubblegum...

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    and how were those stories gross? I'd tell your stories to my mother maybe but I wouldn't bring that weak shit in here.

    now I know how to get in your head before our next game. I'm gonna show you a Playboy. Holy fuck. I thought you were cooler than that bro.
     
  11. JQwon13

    JQwon13 Walk On

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    Something about Dirtycash moaning just makes me want to vomit
     
  12. DirtycashDylan

    DirtycashDylan I came here to scheme and chew bubblegum...

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    Oh, I see the problem. We need to work on your reading comprehension.
     
  13. Full Moon Fever

    Full Moon Fever Champion of Standards

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    Thanks for hijacking my thread putos.
     
  14. DirtycashDylan

    DirtycashDylan I came here to scheme and chew bubblegum...

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    Seriously Qwon, how are we gonna go hit the clubs and bang hookers in Dallas now if you blush so easily?
     
  15. Bl0ndeRedHead

    Bl0ndeRedHead Official TSO Pothead

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    I was getting a blowjob in high school once in the bed of my pickup truck, and my gf at the time HATED swallowing or having it on her, so every time I came in the bed of the truck she'd jack me off over the side of it, until this one time I decided "fuck it" and held her head down on my dick while I came in her throat. We broke up soon afterward
     
  16. JQwon13

    JQwon13 Walk On

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    Guess I'll have to just man up
     

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