The Tebow Drinking Game

Discussion in 'The Cheap Seats' started by JOEDESIGNS, Dec 5, 2009.

  1. JOEDESIGNS

    JOEDESIGNS Walk On

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    The Tebow Drinking Game

    *DISCLAIMER* Daddy Amp nor Florida State are responsible for the amount of alcohol you consume, also we remind you to have a DD or call a cab, because trust us, you are gonna be HAMMERED*​


    And with that, AWAY WE GO!!!!!!!





    The SEC College Football Season comes to a climax this weekend in the Florida v Alabama championship game in Atlanta . The son of Chuck Norris, Tim Teblow will face an Alabama team aching for revenge after last year's SEC championship loss to the same unholy lord of college football. Face it folks, even though Teblow spends his free time preaching to the incarcerated, curing cancer (we assume), trimming the foreskin of the impoverished, and keeping the planets properly aligned by toting the earth around the sun to keep it in its proper orbit; on the field he's not nearly so generous. On the field he dominates. Just ask him. He'll tell you over and over again.



    In honor of Tebow's sheer awesomeness (gag), we give you the Tebow SEC Championship Drinking Game!



    * Drink every time Tebow is called "a warrior." Bonus chug if any of your friends sing the first two hours lines of Scandal's opus "I am a warrior" and change the lyrics to "Tebow is..." Dance, Tebow, you magnificent bastard.



    * Drink every time Tebow's called "a leader," then salute.



    * Drink every time Tebow's called a "special athlete," then yell "Tiiiimmmmmmmmay!"



    * Finish your drink if the announcers suggest Tebow should win the Heisman again this year.



    * Drink every time Tebow points to the sky. Then realize the only reason the sky hasn't fallen is the strength of his pointing.



    * Drink every time Tebow references God. Or himself. Tom-A-to. Tom-ah-to.



    * Drink every time he's shown on the sidelines flapping his arms like a bird (or an idiot) to pump up the crowd.



    * If (when) Tebow actually takes flight, finish your drink and do a shot.



    * Drink every time Tebow's on camera for no reason when the Florida defense is on the field.



    * Drink every time Tebow is seen screaming with his helmet off.



    * Drink every time they show a "I Heart Tebow" sign in the stands.



    * Drink every time you see a Florida fan in jorts. (Small sips on this one. Otherwise it could kill you).



    * Shot every time they mention his experience as missionary.



    * If they mention him performing circumcisions in the Philippines while he was a missionary - Chug your beer, do a shot of Patron.



    * If (when) they mention Riley Cooper is his roomate. - Shot of whatever is available



    **When Alabama wins and Tebow gives a tearful speech in the post-game press conference, give the television the bird, turn up your bottle of Jim Beam, and don't stop drinking OR flipping off the TV till Tebow runs out of tears. (This may take several bottles of Jim) Then throw the empty bottle(s) through the television and quote the good book by saying "the Terrence Cody falls upon the just and the unjust alike!" Club a baby seal and start prepping for Texas.



     
  2. KnightNoles

    KnightNoles Learn to Compete

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    Ohh. wow but spot on. You will be drunk before the game kicks off!!
     
  3. MurkYa21

    MurkYa21 Walk On

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    LMFAO!!!!!!!!!!!! :D
     
  4. Lee.Flex

    Lee.Flex Ducks Fan

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    Im already wasted from just browsing the ESPN Website.
     
  5. Juggernautblitz

    Juggernautblitz Carbon glutton

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    That's great stuff! There would be an even higher probability of death if you were to take a drink every time Teblow throws an errant or wobbly pass.
     
  6. jfosh

    jfosh Super

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    I better buy some more beer before the game.
     
  7. Basis4aDay56

    Basis4aDay56 Walk On

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    Anyone have a spare keg lying around? I just drank mine watching Gameday!
     
  8. Juggernautblitz

    Juggernautblitz Carbon glutton

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    Vern Lundquist and Gary Danielson are still drunk from the last Florida game they did.
     
  9. SonOfGod3452

    SonOfGod3452 Guest

    just bought a case of jim beam and a few 30 racks in preparation for the tim tebow drinking game today
     
  10. KnightNoles

    KnightNoles Learn to Compete

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    Well you would already be layin on the couch... after that segment
     
  11. mcyork

    mcyork Walk On

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    [​IMG]

    I found this on Maizenbrew web site!
     
  12. MurkYa21

    MurkYa21 Walk On

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    Mcelroy is stealing the show! fuck

    edit: HAHAHAHHAHA
     
  13. MaxATX34

    MaxATX34 Texas Football

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    lol i almost peed
     
  14. Lee.Flex

    Lee.Flex Ducks Fan

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    One bottle of Jimmy Down.... and there hasn't even been the post game press conference yet.
     
  15. Juggernautblitz

    Juggernautblitz Carbon glutton

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    I've never seen so many camera shots and praising comments about a guy whose team was getting pummeled and he was having a pretty bad game. Tebow only threw about 3 or 4 good passes all game. Most of them were behind or too high even though most of them were less than 10 yard passes. Great college career though for a fullback playing QB.
     

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