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Archived Under the Umbrella w/Reign: NDColts1979 (Illinois Fightin' Illini)

Discussion in 'Thread Archive' started by JerzeyReign, Oct 30, 2010.

  1. JerzeyReign

    JerzeyReign #BeatOhio

    Oct 26, 2009



    LazyEye Scott: How's it going Coach? Your Illini are two seasons removed from that dream 2010 season in which you went 11-2. What will it take to prove that season was not a fluke but a new standard for Illini football?

    Coach NDColts: Recruiting. We have been unable to attract any top caliber talent to our school despite that successful year.

    LazyEye Scott: What will it take to attract them then?

    Coach NDColts: Hugh Hefner to come and do a Playboy shoot.

    LazyEye Scott: Shout out to Uncle Hef. Coach, what conference foe will present the biggest matchup problem for your football team?

    Coach NDColts: Everyone. Comparing talent levels of the elite schools and ours, we have a lot of growing up to do.

    LazyEye Scott: Strongest part of your 2013 squad?

    Coach NDColts: Nothing.

    LazyEye Scott: Nothing? Not a whole lot of confidence in the kids that will give you their all and believe in your system but hey I'm just a analyst what do I know? What's your weakness?

    Coach NDColts: Our entire team.

    LazyEye Scott puts head down and is shocked of the lack of confidence a coach shows in his team on national television.

    LazyEye Scott: Ok. Your a very defensive minded coach. Who steps up to keep your defense's swag on deck?

    Coach NDColts: Maraez Wilson.

    LazyEye Scott: No reason needed I see. Maraez Wilson. Kid must be a baller to not have a reason why he's going to be the anchor. Let his play do the talkin', I feel that. Your moving to the spread but you have transfer Carlton Thomas in the backfield. Are you going to go back to Big 10 football and hand the rock off to him and let him put in work this year?

    Coach NDColts: Yeah, we plan on him being our feature back this season.

    LazyEye Scott: Ok coach one more question before we go into the six pack. Other than your team or any conference mate, who do you think has the best shot at winning it all?

    Coach NDColts: Florida. When you can bring in talent like that your going to be a tough matchup for anybody.

    LazyEye Scott: Fair Enough. Ok coach I'm going to call out something and I want you to give me the first word that pops into your head to describe it. Ready?.... Big 10 Football?

    Coach NDColts: Black and Blue

    LazyEye Scott: Illinois Football

    Coach NDColts: Red Grange

    LazyEye Scott: Ohio State

    Coach NDColts: Choke Artists

    LazyEye Scott: Michigan

    Coach NDColts: Hype

    LazyEye Scott: Boise State

    Coach NDColts: Powderpuff Girls

    LazyEye Scott: Lady GaGa

    Coach NDColts: Man

    LazyEye Scott: :chuckles: Ok their you have it. Coach of the Fightin' Illini, Coach NDColts, thanks for your time and good luck this season.
  2. NDCOLTS1979

    NDCOLTS1979 I love you red solo cup

    Oct 17, 2009
    Down goes Thomas for season broken shoulder on his 7th run season
  3. LambeauLeap04

    LambeauLeap04 Walk On

    Jul 6, 2010
    aww man that sucks. thats the last thing you needed to happen.

    and i think Stu Scott has a glass eye actually. I remember hearing that a long time ago, but I could be wrong. It would scare the hell out of me if I saw him up close.
  4. benbuckeye

    benbuckeye Walk On

    Nov 14, 2009
    I can remember when he had a normal eye...I think he was playing a flag football game or something and got hit in the face...Remember seeing him on sportscenter and thinking, what the hell happened to him lol
  5. Jvigorous1

    Jvigorous1 Hokie

    Nov 2, 2009
    LOL great write up Jersey!
  6. Maximus21

    Maximus21 BCS Chaos - Syracuse

    Dec 8, 2009
    That is some funny stuff right there. I really wish the Illini had more to work with. I hate to see him getting crushed in recruiting after winning the Rose Bowl and doing so well with the poor talent he started off with.
  7. Jvigorous1

    Jvigorous1 Hokie

    Nov 2, 2009
    Yea you would think a schools prestige would go up after winning a BCS Bowl game but it didn't help much

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